Do you long for real, deep, Christ-centered friendships? Or wish to strengthen existing ones?Sweet sister, you are not alone. You were created to be in relationship and community with other people. Take a look at Proverbs 17:17, 18:24, 25:20, 27:5-6.
Two of the attributes at the heart of friendship are commitment + vulnerability. We should be seeking people who we can commit ourselves to, not who we can get the most out of.
To have the close friendships you desire you have to be vulnerable (able to be wounded). This means that you are able to be wounded by their wounds (Provers 25:20) and willing to move into someone else’s pain/hurt. A true friend is willing to be vulnerable in confrontation (Proverbs 27:6) because true friends say hard things, not for retribution but for restoration. They are willing to risk the friendship for the good of their friends. If you are unwilling to say hard things you are no longer a friend but an enemy. Lastly, true friends are able to be wounded by confession (James 5:16). In real friendship you are able to let down your guard and actually let friends in to see your fears, failures, joys and successes.
True friendship can be scary but because of the gospel, we are freed to be good friends to the people that God has placed in our life (John 15). And we have the perfect mirror for friendships in Christ, because he entered into the perfect friendship with us (John 11). We see beautiful examples of true friendship when Jesus weeps with Mary and Martha at Lazarus’ death. Why did he weep? Because he knows what it means to enter into someone’s grief. The book of Isaiah describes Jesus as a man of sorrows. Jesus is well acquainted with grief.
We will not be good friends to others until we begin to enjoy our friendship with Jesus, the deep and abiding costly friendship that he paid for on the cross.
Do you enjoy Christ’s friendship in that way? How can you serve the people that the Lord has placed in your life well?
originially written for daughterofdelight.com